i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
it hurts more in the daytime
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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