so that wasnt chicken after all
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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