I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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