bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
