the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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