even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Randomize