i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
