I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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