all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
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I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
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He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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