I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize