i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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