Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize