This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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