Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
She has the best kind of daddy issues
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
