If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
this hospital has no fireball
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Randomize
