my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
