so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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