I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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