the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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