I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
