Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
