: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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