Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize