Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
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