I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
i drank out of a bidet.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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