Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
