I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
