this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
