Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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