Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?

  (1-815): View more from Illinois

  You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815) Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off? (1-815) You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it. http://tfl.nu/du1d
  Replies (16) Good night (1448) Bad night (587)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I think I just saw someone hide a body.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I think I just saw someone hide a body. http://tfl.nu/2aay
  Replies (13) Good night (1595) Bad night (2732)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house http://tfl.nu/fhfx
  Replies (17) Good night (3951) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it? http://tfl.nu/eoc0
  Replies (3) Good night (2692) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): 10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza http://tfl.nu/0z5o
  Replies (35) Good night (7277) Bad night (627)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it. http://tfl.nu/n6vl
  Replies (8) Good night (4311) Bad night (826)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle http://tfl.nu/1njn
  Replies (10) Good night (3403) Bad night (1751)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him. http://tfl.nu/a6jy
  Replies (4) Good night (3495) Bad night (685)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka http://tfl.nu/h91z
  Replies (10) Good night (2302) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job. http://tfl.nu/jru8
  Replies (6) Good night (3152) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless. http://tfl.nu/y6il
  Replies (9) Good night (2659) Bad night (1110)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them http://tfl.nu/2e8h
  Replies (4) Good night (934) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser http://tfl.nu/4p89
  Replies (5) Good night (433) Bad night (974)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth http://tfl.nu/2qc1
  Replies (10) Good night (1371) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies. http://tfl.nu/8j70
  Replies (2) Good night (277) Bad night (451)

Randomize