that's an acceptable place to lick
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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