i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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