I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
Love having children with random chicks
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing