You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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