After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
