oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
