So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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