To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
