How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
