There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
