Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
