i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
