I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
