If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
