i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I'm too high and old for this...
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
