Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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