If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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