I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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