the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
