Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
